Flowers and Ink
by geradsredskittle666
Summary: McKay's mysterious past comes back to hurt him. Sheppard's team is ordered to take a week off and Earth finds trouble for McKay and Sheppard when McKay's abusive father returns. Warnings for child abuse and implied rape. McKay/Sheppard friendship
1. Chapter 1

Flowers and Ink

AN: So just recently gotten obsessed with this show, excuse any errors and show related misspellings. If you are aware of my work on Mea Culpa, you know to expect a high level of whump.

Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate Atlantis and any of its plots or characters. I write for entertainment and do not make profit off this work.

Warnings: child abuse, implied rape of a child.

Pairings: Sheppard/McKay friendship but you can read it as slash if you want.

 **START**

Rodney McKay and John Sheppard were on Earth, relaxing in their holiday rental. It had been too long since their last week or even days of leisure time...upon reviewing their teams following a mission, Heightmeyer had been shocked. So she had ordered the team take a week off.

Reluctantly Rodney had chosen to visit his sister on Earth and since John also had family, he had followed. Well that and he was worried about his friend. Rodney had been under the usual 'mere minutes to death of his friends unless he performed a miracle of genius' pressure on an almost daily basis. That wasn't normal. Even for a genius. So he had chosen to stay with his friend. Rodney hadn't argued against that. That either meant he trusted John a lot more than he showed which was good or that he was more emotional unstable than usual which was bad.

Teyla and Ronon had gone to the Athusion settlement to relax for the week. Ronon could assist the males with the hunting, protecting of the village and any building needed. The Athusions knew a man like him had value so they welcomed his stay. He agreed to help anyway they asked.

John was no fool. He had a knack no one else seemed to have for reading the often difficult McKay. He had noticed how stressed his friend was. He noticed the exhaustion, the slowed reflexes and dark shadows under his friends eyes. Rodney was also snapping freely at others, his temper quicker to surface.

He also noticed how his friend was much less cheerful and seemed more distant than ever. That was worrying. Rodney had a history of poor habits that included depression.

Currently his friend was on the lounge, unknowingly drifting to sleep. That is until a knock on the door. Grumbling Rodney got up and checked the door. The scientist froze. On the step was an orange flower and a letter tied to it. Rodney gritted his teeth and picked up the flower. He looked around, hoping for a clue but nothing stood out. He read the note and almost dropped the flower as if it was searing hot.

By this time John had noticed and approached his friend. He could see how tense his friend was, how controlled his breathing had become and how he held the flower at a distance. "Rodney?" he said with caution. When Rodney didn't move or show he had heard, Sheppard place a hand on the other males shoulder. McKay jumped with a terrified yell. John moved to calm the frightened man, concerned at who had made Rodney react like this. The wide scared eyes seemed to change from frightened to guarded.

Rodney just shut the door and threw the flower on the nearby table. Strangely with a gentle way as if the flower needed care and a harsh frightened anger. Rodney still didn't answer John but just sat back down. He drew his legs to his chest and rested his head there. His body shook and he seemed to be sobbing.

John was looking to the flower and his friend. He read the note out loud "Thought you might want to put this on her grave." Who would send such a thing? Who's grave? What kind of person would force anyone to remember someone that had died?

Growling in his protective way, he put an arm around his friend. "You know who sent this" he stated.

Rodney didn't have to look up to confirm his suspicion. "His back, John. His messing with me. It was all my fault" he said in distant shaky voice.

Anyone who would hurt his Rodney was going to pay. No one hurt anyone he cared for and got away with it. "Who?"

Rodney look up this time, fear clearly in his eyes and tears on his face. "He was supposed to be gone. He was never supposed to find us again." then he looked even more panicked "I need to contact my sister!" he announced.

John comforted his friend. When he had stopped crying and looked more steady, Rodney spoke again. "We were just kids. Sure we weren't normal kids but that made it worse for us. He was our enemy. I protected her from him till she was old enough to move out. Still he left marks on her. How could he not when we all knew so much more?" Rodney told softly.

John listened with patience. His friend rarely opened up. Who? What kind of marks? Physical ones? Mental ones? Or something much more innocent?

"The flower was mums favourite. He is reminding me of who killed her. Taunting me when he refuses to face up to his own crimes. At least I could admit my crime." Rodney said bitterly.

John didn't know that Rodney mother was dead or that she had been killed. What was Rodney's 'crimes'? He had to ask though. "So who did?"

Rodney gave a bitter laugh "It was me. I refused one of his orders. I knew he would kill her. It was me." Rodney said the last part softer and full of regret. Sure Rodney was stubborn but he was loyal. Maybe he was protecting someone?

John frowned. "I know you and your not a killer. He killed her. Not you." he said clearly. How could anyone believe that they killed their parent? Even worse, live with it?

"Thats not how he tells it. I suppose its been long enough to forget about it anyway. Shes dead and thats all that matters. Maybe not even that anymore" Rodney excused bitterly. But of course it mattered. Anyone that said otherwise was lying. Rodney's bitterly casual tone didn't convince John.

John was getting a sinking feeling about who "he" was. The mere idea of it made him sick. "You need to tell me who so I can give this animal what he deserves" he growled lowly.

Rodney gave a harsh laugh. "He calls himself my father but he has done nothing to earn that title but donate sperm" he said distantly. John could tell it was hard to admit but it was truth. As a man of science Rodney had to face truth above comfort.

The harsh angry side Rodney was showing was scaring John. Not just because Rodney could hurt others or himself but because he had hidden it so easily from him. He had never seen his friend so angry or merciless. Still under that mask was pain. It was clear to him that Rodney was hurt and had no more idea how to handle it than any other human emotion.

How could anyone carry such an emotional burden? All those mothers days, christmas's and other days that families were thought of must have been difficult. How could it not when his father was abusive, his mother dead and his sister estranged? He must have coped somehow. He remembered how he had brushed off concerns around such times. Either excusing himself to work on some vital project or when that failed claiming he needed to catch up on sleep. Given how much time he gave willingly to the teams off world duties and his own science duties both as a scientist and head of his department, the claim for sleep could never be refuted. So he got out of it.

John felt shocked. How could a parent harm a child? Their own flesh and blood! Knowing they would harm them or kill them. He was angry at his friends father. Insanely angry. Like 'putting a bullet in his brain and leaving the animal to die where no one could find him' angry. To hurt his closest friend was a mistake that no sane or maybe even insane man would make. Even Ronon would not willingly do that and the setatan was worth 2 men at least!

He felt sorry for his friend. To have to be so strong as a child...it explained some things. His incredible loyalty even under torture. After all he had experienced what John would call torture at the hands of this "father" animal. His stubborn nature. His strange and definitely inhuman way of holding back pain when it was absolutely needed. In some of his life or death situations that he had saved his team, Rodney had been badly injured and in more pain than any normal human could handle. Yet still he saved the day. Of course that seemed to apply only selectively...which was another mystery. His creative ability to think his way out of any situation that even his fellow (yet to a lessor extent) genius science team seemed to lack. Of course that was put down to his high genius yet John (who was so an extent one himself) knew that took years of training and the right situations. Push the right buttons and anyone could find a way out. Forced to Rodney could rival any man or alien in that department, even the Asguards (despite the fact the Deadlas's Asguard so often mocked him).

He felt lost. What does one say? 'Its okay'! That was not correct. His fathers actions were not okay. The physical marks and scars were not okay. The mental impact that scarred for life was not okay. 'I understand'! No that was wrong too. John could not apply any of this to his life. So that would be lying. 'It will be okay'! No even that was wrong. Who was he to predict the future? To give false hope.

Instead he just hugged him.

It was the only action that made sense. That conveyed his feelings without showing pity or lying. Rodney was surprised at first and seemed to tense up. Surprising his friend was never a good idea. Rodney always looked like he had seen a ghost and despite the angry reaction to cover up his panic, John had often silently observed slight shaking. Still he seemed to trust John enough. He didn't move away. He seemed to relax after a few seconds. Rodney made no move to return the hug or consciously react.

However unknowingly he had a small contented smile on his face and leaned slightly into the touch. An instinctive reaction that could not be helped but showed John just how much he needed the touch. This troubled John more than he wanted to admit. His friend had no idea how to react to affection. Even if he did have some small clue, he was too afraid to peruse it. That animal that called himself "father" would pay! He vowed to help Rodney any way he could.

Quiet sobs brought him out of his thoughts of torture and he rubbed the other males back comfortingly. "I won't let him hurt you. You hear that Rodney. Whatever it takes, we will make it through the week. Let him try get you when I'm protecting you!" he said firmly to his friend.

He felt a nod and took that as acceptance of his help. After a few minutes, he felt Rodney's breathing even out and a his body relax. With a smile, he placed his sleeping friend on the lounge and put a blanket over him.

Carefully John secured the holiday house and made sure no one could get in. Good. After all that had happened he felt a sense of calm. He could do this. He made sure his handgun was loaded and in working order. The base knew how valuable the pair were so let them keep their guns.

Observing Rodney sleeping peacefully, he couldn't help but wonder what now? With a sigh, he went to the kitchen to make coffee and make sense of his thoughts.

When Rodney woke again, he felt strangely better. Though that didn't last long. As he showered, he went over what had happened. What would Sheppard think of him now?

He had cried like a baby. Any proper man would have put him in his place. Any proper man would have demanded he stop crying and deal with it like a real man. Of course being non violent made that impossible. He must be defective then.

Just as his father had said.

He could still hear his fathers disdainful tone "all those brains and you can't even be normal. You'll never be a real man." At the time the remark had cut deep. Now he just accepted he wasn't normal. Or manly. He was just Rodney.

It was a depressing thought but what else could he do but accept it?

The devil himself was back. He knew he should act brave. Pretend that the idea didn't scare him as much as it did. He just wanted to break down and cry. Properly cry. He wanted to yell to the heavens that it was unfair. He had done his time. He was still paying for it even now. He wanted to give up. End what he knew was a battle that would only end in that devils death. Still the stubborn spark of life that had kept him alive against all odds would never let him. He was a surviver. Against all odds. All he could do was try keep it all in. Locked away with the memories he refused to acknowledge unless it was in nightmare form.

Still he hadn't expected to be found so quickly. Was no where safe? Did he have to run until one of them died? He didn't like the idea but knew he could if he needed to. Survive at all costs. That gave him little comfort though.

He had admitted the abuse though. That scared him more than he could admit. Rule 1 was to never tell. You tell and you end up dead. It was that simple.

If his father found out then he was already dead. Did he want to die?

No, he had good friends and loved his job. He loved tinkering with technology that he would never have seen if he had stayed on Earth. Maybe. Yes, then he would be free of all the pain. With a smile he traced the scars on his arms. He didn't know.

He dressed and went to find his friend. Time to find out what his very manly friend thought of such a weak child. He could almost hear the taunt "So you really are a girl Meredith" said in that sly way.

Sheppard brightened up at the sight of Rodney. Though something was off. Rodney kept his face guarded and his eyes were hard. His posture seemed somewhat slack as if resigned to a fate he never wanted to face. "Feeling better?" John asked.

His friend paused as if analysing him and the question. He nodded.

"Come on, don't do this. Tell me whats going on in that big brain of yours." he said concerned. He refused to lose Rodney this soon.

His friend seemed to see the concern and for a moment his eyes showed fear. Then it was gone.

"Just get it over with already" Rodney snapped angry.

What was going on? "Rodney, your scaring me. You know we are friends. Nothing will change that. Tell me why your angry at me." he said carefully. His friend he knew was in there but this angry version was making things difficult.

"Nothing? Why would a proper man want to be around a defect like me?" Rodney asked in that angry tone but hurt also run under it. Hurt?

Wait...John realised "Do you think I don't want to be friends anymore? That I would abandon you for what? Crying? Being scared? Needing comfort?" he asked in shock.

Rodney looked away but John could see the anger was not winning against the hurt.

"God Rodney! Why would you even think – no wait I can guess where this came from. I don't care that you cried or was scared or that you needed me! Anyone would react the same. Even the rest of the men on base. What he did to you wasn't normal. Wasn't right. Wasn't – people are not mean't to be that strong. People are not meant to survive that. Not sane anyway." he said trying to say all his thoughts at once. Did his friend seriously think this?

The hurt had faded to confusion. "So we're good?" asked his friend in a small voice.

"Yeah, always" he confirmed.

That seemed to be enough for his friend. Rodney paused the spoke again "sorry" he said.

Sheppard softened at that "You have nothing to be sorry for."

"But I scared you" Rodney said quickly.

"Only because you were angry, which was only because you needed to deflect the fact you were hurt at the thought of losing a friend" he stated matter a factly.

"But I'm not good enough-" his friend had started to say.

With a growl Sheppard had interrupted. "Don't even start with that defect stuff again. I don't care what that animal told you. Just because you cry or show pain, thats no reason your not a man. Just because you can't fight like the other men on the base, that doesn't mean you are a defect. Your smart and loyal. Thats enough for them. Thats enough for me." he said firmly.

Rodney just stared. The genius seemed confused. But thats not what John found most distressing...it was the fact he seemed so...lost? Hurt was clear as well as the desire for comfort but he remained rooted to the spot, distain and disgust clear too.

However in an instant, the need for comfort won. Without hesitation Rodney hugged John, burying his head into the males chest. John knew that his reaction would be critical. With ease he wrapped his arms protectively around his friend. No one would hurt his friend while he was around. He swore silently to help his friend with this. "Its okay" he said softly, hoping that this would show his friend that affection was okay. It seemed to work.

John wasn't sure how long later but his friend stirred. "Need to call my sister" he excused.

He listened from the other room.

"Hey I need to tell you something. More of a warning..."Rodney began.

A pause.

"Father is back." he said his voice shaking slightly.

A pause.

"Yes I'm fine. He just left me a note. Just messing with me like he always did"

A pause.

"Yes I'll see you tomorrow. Just be careful okay. Keep the kid safe too, you know he would do anything to hurt me."

A pause.

"Trust your big brother. I will be fine. Its you that needs protecting and I won't hear a word against it!"

A pause.

"Yes I remember that. He won't...no can't do that again. I'm bigger now."

A pause.

"Listen, relax. I will be okay. You need to calm down and secure the house. Make sure your safe. Make sure your daughter is safe. I promise I can handle him. I'm stronger now. I'm not that same kid."

A pause.

"Just listen to me. I'll see you tomorrow. If he even tries to get you, call me. I swear he will regret it."

A pause.

"See you tomorrow then"

He heard the sound of Rodney hanging up. His head was full of questions. Why had Rodney acted like it was nothing? Judging by his reactions, it was far from nothing. So what was worse? No... back track that idea before more sickening images came to mind. Why had he insisted so highly on keeping his sister safe?

Why had she been so worried about him? Just how far had the animal gone? He felt a rush of anger again. That animal would pay.

AN: Find out more next chapter! Read and review.


	2. Chapter 2

Flowers and Ink

Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate Atlantis and any of its plots or characters. I write for entertainment and do not make profit off this work.

Warnings: child abuse, implied rape of a child.

Pairings: Sheppard/McKay friendship but you can read it as slash if you want.

It was morning and Rodney was preparing himself. He breathed deep and tried to relax. He could not focus oh his fear. He could not focus on the past. That would break him. His sister needed a strong protector and his father could not see any weakness.

What of John? He had to make sure his friend was safe. His father could not hurt him.

"Ready to go?" he heard John ask.

"Yes." he replied with strength.

SASASASASASASASASSASASASSASSASSASASASASASASASASASASASASASASA

His sister had looked relieved to see him. She took some moments to look her brother over. Sheppard noticed this and took note.

Rodney seemed to notice to and only rolled his eyes. "I told you I was fine, can we go in where its safe?" he asked only slightly annoyed. His tone while sharp, had soft caring undertones. Jeanie seemed to collect herself and nod.

They relaxed with coffee, the familiar heat and scent relaxing them all. Still the siblings remained tense. She broke the silence. "Thanks" she said quietly.

Sheppard tried to discern her tone but it was complex. She sounded tired yet alert. Like Rodney did when the city was in danger yet he had barely slept. She sounded sad yet hopeful. Yet she sounded worried. He wasn't sure if it was about her past or her future.

Rodney just nodded. "What is family for?" he said softly in an openly caring way that John rarely saw. Usually when it was just the team or just him and Zelenka.

"What do you think he is here for?" she asked her voice trembling.

Rodney reached out a hand to comfort her. "Mess with me. Hurt me. What he usually does." he replied bitterly. He sounded strong, never letting his own fear show. "Still you have me. I'd die before letting him hurt you" he said protectively. John didn't doubt that.

Jeannie frowned. "Yeah and why's that?" she said sharply. Her stubborn glare showed hidden hurt.

"Your family. Its my duty to protect you. Don't start this again" Rodney said warningly. But it was not a harsh warning. It was a soft gentle warning.

"And why not? I want to hurt him as much as you do!" she snapped, her anger getting the better of her.

Instead of getting angry Rodney just sighed. The usual sharp tongue that he used often seemed absent. "You don't get it. Its not about hurting him. Not that I'd pass up shooting him but thats not the point. He is a monster. More than you ever saw. You will never know how much his capable of." he said softly. It was both a comfort and a warning. Jeannie had better sense than to pry into dark inhuman realities.

She fell silent. "I'm sorry Meredith, I wish you would tell me but I know its hard." she said quietly.

"Wheres the kid?" Rodney asked concerned.

"I told them to find a hotel till this is over. For her" his sister replied.

Rodney nodded approvingly. "We can speak openly then. I told Sheppard roughly what happened." he said.

Jeanie smiled. She seemed to approve of Sheppard.

John was keeping one hand on his gun. He was focused on any sound that was out of place. A knock sounded and he was alert.

Jeannie froze. She was clearly afraid.

Rodney froze too but only for a moment. He seemed to will himself to move to answer the door. It was with a feral growl that scared even Sheppard that he spoke. "What do you want?"

His father laughed. "Just let me in and you will find out. Unless you want your pretty sister hurt. You know I can find you and get you or her anywhere on this Earth." he threatened.

Rodney had to concede and let him him.

The man looked pleased and strolled in as if for a casual chat over coffee. "Ah your here dear, still as beautiful ever I see" he said charmingly to Jeannie.

Jeanne froze and John moved to comfort her, eyes fixed on the man. He noticed with disgust that the mans eyes traced her form with a feral grin. His own daughter! That was sickening!

Rodney growled and his father turned to Rodney. "Well I see your just as warm" he said coldly. There was a threat behind it too.

His friend seemed to sense this too. "Eyes off her you sick fuck! You won't hurt her as long as I'm here"

His father just laughed. The sound was wrong.

John realised with a jolt that his friend wasn't surprised by his fathers actions. That meant...no not now...another thing that he had to avoid thinking about till it was safe to puke.

"You can talk...your looking much more manly than before too" his father eyes trailed the new muscles that Rodney had gained from training on base with Ronon.

John felt like throwing up again. The implication was wrong. So very wrong. Even worse was the way Rodney just glared. He wasn't surprised. He acted as if it was normal. What if it was?

"Still by the looks of your friend, you really can't talk! I always knew you would become a fag!" his father said harshly. An odd mix of disgust and lust was in his eyes.

"Or maybe you always were" he suggested with a cold grin that chilled John. Rodney paled but otherwise just glared.

Did Sheppard even want to wonder what that meant?

"You'd like that to be true wouldn't you? Giving you a reason to beat us senseless. I'm more than that." Rodney said so darkly it scared both his sister and friend. "Or maybe you just want a fuck? The street girls too legal for you?" he taunted purposely. Again that dark implication.

His father lost his cool. In less than a second he had struck Rodney so hard it echoed and he fell to the floor. Both Jeannie and John were taken by surprise. John quickly assessed his friend. He was bleeding from where he had fallen and the mark was bruising an angry red. Blood marked the impact site and Rodney looked like he was in pain. Even unfocussed. Concussion.

"Well, am I right?" Rodney asked without humour, his eyes locking with the sharp angry ones of his father.

"Oh you would want that to be true. Would your boyfriend get off on that?" his father taunted right back.

John realised it was a game they were used too.

Rodney just laughed. John knew what his father had implied. He also knew that Rodney hadn't denied anything. He would need to find out what had happened.

"But you know what I really want. What was always mine but I was never allowed! Your bitch mother wouldn't let me. Then her bitch son was just as bad!" he fumed angrily.

Rodney flinched and paled. "No. I'm not sorry for getting in your way." he said firmly. His strong voice betrayed by his fearful body language.

"If I can't have her, no one can." his father stated in a scarily calm way.

Rodney looked scared. He looked like he was going to do something he would regret. "John, get her out of here to safety. I will take care of this personally." he said urgently.

John desperately wanted to argue but knew it was Jeannie's best chance. "I'll come back for you." he said before the pair started to get up.

Rodney focused and breathed deeply. "You get me. You can have me. Jeanie leaves here alive."

His father eyed his son carefully. "You know what this means. You know this is only until next time. You know what I want." he stated calmly.

His son just looked him in the eye "Thats why its such a good deal right?" he said just as calmly. Then in a lighter tone "You know I know what to do".

"She can leave then." his father said distractedly.

The pair left as quickly as they could. John would be back when he had secured a place for his sister.

SASASASASASASASASSASASASSASSASSASASASASASASASASASASASASASASA

When Sheppard returned Rodney was greatful. His father had left already but that didn't make him feel anymore safe. Not until he was back to Atlantis. His home.

John paused, looking over his friend in worry. Rodney was pale and shaking. Rodney was unfocussed and distant. The lack of physical wounds apart from the head wound was both a relief and a worry. Clearly the man had a plan, so what was it that had Rodney worked up? What had been done instead?

John leaned down to Rodney's level speaking softly. He had to tread carefully. "Your sister is safe" he spoke.

When Rodney didn't reply, John reached over to his friend. Rodney shuffled back in fear, desperately held behind a glare. He frowned at the unusual behaviour. "You know I won't hurt you. Your safe." John spoke softly.

"Safe?" came the scientists first words.

"Yes." confirmed John.

Thankfully Rodney believed him and he relaxed again. John frowned "Are you hurt any where?" he asked gently but urgently.

"Just my head and a few bruises." Rodney replied briefly, leaving out any other details. John would need to ask later. Right now his friend needed to calm and focus.

John tried to sound encouraging. "Thats good. You can tell me later what happened." he said softly.

Still Rodney whimpered and tensed up.

John was pushing back that familiar anger again. Just what had Rodney's father put his son through to cause this reaction? "I promise I won't make you talk. When you are ready and only then." he promised firmly.

Rodney calmed down again thankfully.

"Want to go back to the hotel?" John asked softly.

Rodney smiled and nodded.

Jeannie looked worriedly at her brother. She was about to comment when Sheppard sent a look that told her it wasn't the time or place. She was both hurt and comforted that her brother had learned to trust his team mate so easily.

She was more than pleased that Sheppard returned the trust and care for his team. She started the car and let the men settle in the back. John looked wary and alert. Rodney looked tired. He instinctively let his head slide onto Johns shoulder. It was mere minutes till he slept.

When they arrived at the holiday house, John managed to wake him and lead him into his room. Rodney seemed to jump at the chance for a shower and fresh clothing.

AN: Read and review as always!


	3. Chapter 3

Ink and Flowers

 **Disclaimer:** I don't own Stargate Atlantis or any of its property. I write to entertain and make no profit from this work.

 **Warnings:** implied rape (father/son as child and father/adult son), child abuse, spouse abuse, implied intention to rape (father/daughter as child)

 **Pairings:** Sheppard/McKay friendship

Rodney had fallen asleep and it was just Jeannie and Sheppard up. Rodney was exhausted so sleep came easy for him. John was left to his thoughts which were not pretty. Jeannie looked far too wired to settle yet. Too much had happened too fast.

John was far from okay but he kept up the appearance for both McKay siblings sake. They needed it over his need to rationalise such horrified thoughts. Still maybe his need was too great. He found himself gravitating to Jeanne for answers.

She seemed to predict his need for answers and just smiled encouragingly. He was reminded of Teyla for a moment. How could the siblings be so different?

"I'm sorry but I have to ask...no I need to. I was only told a general idea of what happened to him as a child." Sheppard said carefully.

Jeannie smiled softly and allowed him sit. "Did he tell you about his mother?" she asked sadly.

"Only how she died" affirmed the male.

She paused looking reflective before starting to speak. "Mer didn't even have a chance after protecting me. I am as smart as he is but I learned how to stay out of trouble better. It helps when you can read others and know how to respond. He was too young to know and made himself a target."

Sheppard knew it was McKay's intelligence that often got him in trouble more often than not. From unknowingly insulting others or just not being good with people, it was always something. "Yeah even on base he finds trouble" John said affectionately.

Jeannie managed a smile and continued. "I was only 3 but he kept me out of trouble. Father was often angry or drunk or both. Most of the time I saw mother get the brunt of it. Always a bruise and that ever pleasant voice she used with him. One day she had done something worse than usual. Father stormed out and she didn't follow. I assumed she was sleeping or crying. Later on I realised he had probably hurt her badly."

John watched trying to keep the angry emotions at bay. This animal had hurt his wife!

She recovered quickly. "He was swearing. He smelled of beer and kept calling her a whore. Kept saying she must have been getting some on the side. I didn't understand then of course. Still I knew even then what lust looked like. Mer didn't even hesitate. He right out glared and distracted father while I locked myself in my room. I didn't understand why but Mer had always been so protective of me."

John was tense now. Focussed like he was in any of his dangerous off world missions.

"I heard thumps and bumps against walls. I heard his yelling and Mer's cries of pain. I heard grunts and father saying someone was a good whore. Then just silence and sobbing. It took everything not to burst open the door and see what was happening. I didn't understand why but I knew father was a bad man after that. I suddenly understood who Mer was protecting me from." she said shakily.

John froze trying to form words. His thoughts raced. Had Rodney's father always acted that way to his friend? Those looks of lust were making more sense than he wanted it too. Those parting words. Was this what Rodney had been referring to when he said it was a "good deal" that he knew what father wanted? He got up without warning and rushed to the kitchen sink, throwing up his lunch. When he had recovered, he saw Jeannie was beside him looking haunted. "I know how you feel" she said softly.

"Did he ever tell you?" he asked.

Jeannie shook her head. "He is a secret keeper that one! He doesn't want to or he just wants to protect me. Maybe both." she said softly.

John tried to calm his thoughts. "His a good brother" he commented.

The sibling merely hummed in agreement. "Mum was nicer though. She was understanding and kind. I wonder why she married father. She was tortured as much as him. He would refuse to let her near him unless he was hurt. She was allowed to help him with injury or sickness. So no one would notice."

John nodded, it made sense.

"It was the only love he knew. He was actually happy in those moments." she continued.

"Still is" commented Sheppard. The scientist seemed to put up a fight when he was injured but always came back to Beckett without fail. While all other forms of affection were seemingly ignored, Rodney would accept help with injury with only miner complaining by his standards. Beckett knew no matter how much fighting and calling medicine "voodoo", his favourite patient would be calm by Rodney standards for him.

Jeannie just smiled sadly. She knew her brother struggled. Though Atlantis seemed to be doing him good. The fact he had friends and was respected was something that was new.

AN: A short one but I think thats a good place to leave it!


End file.
